In the book, Dale talks about techniques that you may use to understand people, to make people like you and want to be around you,
and to learn how to understand people. There are simple ways that he explains his ideas and they seem simple. However, I have chosen a few that would be harder than others for me to master.
“If you are wrong, admit it.” This would end up being one of the toughest ones. In the book, he gave a few examples that this would come into play. I am a prideful person. When it comes to being wrong, it’s harder for me to correct myself due to the reason that I am not leading to my best. I (like most people) don’t like being wrong, and I doubt that you do. The best a man can be is someone who is wrong and will correct it as soon as possible and use it as a learning opportunity.
“Become a great listener.” Everybody likes to talk about themselves, but nobody likes listening to other peoples stories that bore them that go on and on. The trust you can establish is going to last for a long time if you can sit and listen to that person even if it is boring. When he talks about listening, he doesn’t just say “Sit” and “Listen” because that won’t benefit anyone. You need to sit down, look them in the eye, and ask questions about the story from time to time. That shows that you want to know more and that he knows you’re listening.
This one is a simpler one but can be hard for some people at times. “See things through another person’s view.” We may go through some hard part in our life, and think we have the worst, but once we look through another one’s view, we can change our complete perspective. This skill is more for yourself and falls under the category “Influencing People.”
“Appeal to the other person’s nobler motives.” People like being called “Noble.” and “Brave.” as it makes them feel important. In the book, he gave a story of a man who had a renter in his second house who would not pay. The man went to his renting house knowing that this months rent had been long overdue. It had been almost two months since the last paycheck and he didn’t know what to do. He knocked on the door and after he greeted the renter, he told him “I know that you are a man of your words.” That phrase changed the whole conversation, it made the man feel good and made him not want to lie after being called “Noble.” Later on, the man gave him this months rent and left his house. The renter could have very well been a lier and never a man of his word but by saying that he changed the whole scene around.
Thank you for reading and I encourage you to read the book.
Jonah Davis Blogs 